kids

Road Trip: Travel Games

Deb

As you plan for a road trip, entertaining your kids can be a hassle. Our family at home tries to have our kids entertain themselves as much as possible. In the car this can be a little trickier because of the limited number of resources your children have at their disposal. A little pre-planning on your part can go a long way in helping your kids still be able to entertain themselves in the car. Here are some of my favorite no electronic in the car games you can play with your kids or even as an adult to help pass the travel time.

I Spy

My kids love to play this to the point that it almost becomes annoying. Remember the moose in Brother Bear? Anyway here’s how you play. Someone starts by saying “I spy…” and then describing the color or shape of an object. The other people try to guess what object the person is describing. The person who guesses it correctly gets to ask the next question.

Counting

My oldest two kids are old enough to count or recognize different objects. My daughter has done this in the past with airport signs. She’ll watch for the airplane on road signs and count how many she sees in a given town. This can be done with anything. Maybe your driving through a slow construction zone. You could count how many workers you see, you can count how many trucks or construction vehicles you see. Maybe over the course of the whole trip your going to count how many motorcycles you see. This can done as a family or competitively between family members to see who saw the most.

Reading the Map

Similar to the counting game this game can be played individually or as a family. With three days of driving our kids of course are going to ask, “Are we there yet?” If they are old enough to look at a map or read road signs this may help with some of those questions. Before you leave, show your child a map of the journey you are taking. Talk about the different roads you will go on, the different states you will be driving through, and even some of the cities you will be seeing, again this all depends on the age of the child.  Something I’m going to try to do this year is make a list of the major cities we are going through and have the number of miles to our destination after them. Then my oldest can follow along with the list of cities and know where we are in our journey instead of having to ask, “Are we there yet?” she will be able to see how far we still need to go.

Dimes

This was a suggestion from a friend and last year our oldest was still a little young, but this year it worked a lot better. Here’s how it works,  you get a roll of dimes from the bank and give it to the child. (We found a sandwich bag worked well.) You tell them that the five dollars is their money to spend at your destination, but they can also lose the money along the trip for specific reasons. Last year for us it was asking, “Are we there yet?” or having to be told repeatedly to stop some noise or activity. If your child commits one of these errors then they give you a dime. They get to spend whatever is left when you arrive at your destination.

License Plates

I’ve played this since I was young and still do now even though my kids aren’t quite old enough to participate yet. Again this game can be played as a family or competitively. It is pretty simple. You look for different license plates and you write them down as you see them with the goal being to see all fifty states or the most of anyone playing the game. You can put whatever rules you want on how you find the plates. Maybe you want to limit it to only when you are on the road, or you can’t use the plates off of semi-trailers. Modify it to fit your family. Bonus points to the person who sees all the Canadian Provinces, or cars from other countries.

Competitive Scavenger Hunts and List Making

These last two games are very similar. They both take a little bit of prep work before getting in the car. If this is a road trip you’ve been on a few times, pick out some of the unique things you know you will see along the trip. If it’s one you haven’t taken before pick generic things you know you will see along the way. To play a scavenger hunt make a specific list of things and numbers of things the passengers in your car needs to see before the end of the trip. Another way to play (I call it list making) is to write up descriptions for things to see along the trip. The people playing would then write down a location or name of an item that meets that description given in the list. Again the goal would be to finish the list first or before the end of the trip. Example List

Many of these games run along the same lines of looking for things while driving, but having a purpose for the watching you do while driving may turn the activity into enough of a game to make the time go faster. You don’t have to play a game the whole trip, but could set limits like between certain stops or just one of the days of travel. Have you played any of these games with your family. Do you have other games you play with family in the car on road trips? Leave your answers in the comments below.

 

Road Trip: Entertainment in the Car

Deb

Three kids in the back of your car. Going on hour 30 of 38 that you have been driving. How do you keep your sanity? In my family, I’m hoping they are all mid-nap, but rarely do all three of my kids sleep at the same time. We’ve found some ways to help keep the peace in the backseat while still maintaining our own sanity.

Toys

With the three days of travel, we end up stopping at fast food places along the way. Our kids, as most kids their age, are big fans of kid’s meals, and what comes with a kid’s meal but a toy.  Instead of taking these toys into our house after our trip, where they are discarded and soon lost, we put them in a bag that only comes out for long car rides. This solves two problems, one that I don’t want to buy new toys to entertain my kids on each long car ride and two the toys although old are still use so rarely that the kids are engaged with them longer than if I just brought toys they play with at home. Another positive to these toys is that rarely do they make noise and if they do they are usually very loud.

Screen Time

Electronics get suggested many times for car trips with kids. Even as adults something that holds your attention one day may be uninteresting and boring the next. To try to prevent this fatigue, we don’t allow our kids to have any electronics until at least the second day of travel. We have found that the toys and other things we bring do a good job of entertaining the kids for the first day and into the second. We try to limit their screen time at home in the week before we leave also. This gives them the idea that screen time is a treat and holds their attention longer when they actually get to use it.

Crayons, Coloring Books, Workbooks, etc.

My oldest is getting old enough where she can be entertained with reading in the car (though this may not last long, so far we have avoided motion sickness but signs are not good for her). She also likes to do simple worksheets from her summer education workbook. My middle child likes to color. One word of caution on coloring though is to make sure your child won’t color on your car interior, or you could have crayons or markers that only color on allowable surfaces.

Games

Many adults remember playing games with their families while riding in the car as young children. Some of our favorites with young children have been I Spy, counting games, and finding road signs. Some games I look forward to playing with my kids as they get older and more able to participate are the License Plate Game, Competitive Scavenger hunts, and Making list with certain criteria. If you want more information on any of these games see the post about Travel Games.

Packing the Car

It’s great to have all these activities for kids to do while driving in the car, but one last thing to think about while you plan your travels is how to pack your car. All of our kids are still required to ride in car seats and some of them in harnessed car seats. As most of you know this really limits their mobility especially if they drop something. We try to make everything accessible to them even with this limited mobility. Our oldest is a booster seat which makes it easier for her to move and get things that get dropped or hand things to her siblings but still there is only so much you can do from your seat in the car.

We try to keep two bags of stuff for our kids when travelling. One of the bags was mentioned before. It has the kid’s meal toys in it. The other bag has the drawing supplies and any books we bring on the trip. These two bags are usually placed on the seat between out two oldest children. They are easily able to reach the bags and have access to what they want as we go along. We try to refill the bags every time we stop, because toys still get dropped or end up out of reach. The same goes with the I-pad. We only allow them to use it after a stop so we can set up the movie or game for them to do. Our youngest is usually good with just one or two toys that she is able to keep in her car seat.

I hope this has given you some ideas of how to entertain your child in the car on those long summer road trips. Do you have any tried and true tips or tricks for traveling in the car with your little ones. Let us know in the comments below.

 

Road trip: Planning Stops and Meals

Deb

It is summer and that means travel season. For many families this can be a dreaded drive in the car with young children. For my family it means our annual three day drive to California to visit my husband’s family. Now three days stuck in your car is not pleasant for anyone even just by yourself, but put three kids in the back, 6 and under, and it becomes a little more chaotic. So how do we keep our sanity?

Set Rules for Stopping that Everyone can Abide by

Each year, before we set off on our road trip, my husband and I discuss what our stopping rules are. Last year when we traveled, we had a 2 month old (who was nursing), 2 year old, and 5 year old. Our rule when we traveled was that we only stop to feed the baby.  This meant that we had to monitor liquid intake on everyone so those emergency bathroom breaks weren’t necessary. It also meant that we needed car snacks to get us through hunger if it struck while the baby was napping or content in her car seat.

This year we have a 1 year old, 3 year old, and 6 year old. Our stopping rule for this year is for food (meals). We plan to stop only around meal times. This is so when we do stop we are able to stop for an extended period time to let everyone get out and stretch. Even with only stopping for food, we still still be stop every three to four hours.

We find that the three days seem to take even longer if we don’t have a plan to stop. We have even found ourselves stopping every hour and a half at times, which when you stop with three kids is at least a half an hour stop just getting everyone in and out of the car let alone using the restroom or stretching. If we limit ourselves to stopping for set reasons, we are able to have longer stops and still feel like we are getting to where we want to go in a decent amount of time.

Where to Stop

So you know when your stopping, but now you need to decide where to stop. We like to stop at places where our kids can run off energy and also accomplish the purpose of the stop (eating).  We will try to make our stops at places where our kids can freely run around. This may mean a Fast Food restaurant with a play place, a rest stop, or even trying to find a park not too far off the freeway.

How to Stop

We have a routine we follow whenever we stop. It’s many times a plan of divide and conquer. Usually who gets to go first is the adult that needs to use the bathroom the most. For example, I may be using the restroom first so I would take our 6 year old daughter with me. We would head into the restroom at whatever location we stopped at. My husband would be releasing our other two children from car seats. I would bring our daughter and myself back to the car, grab the 1 year old, while he and our son would go use the facilities. If this is at a restaurant, I would be figuring out what the kids and I would be eating. If this is at a rest stop, I would be getting out the food and supplies, we had brought along with us, and getting ready to eat.

When we stop for food, there are a few things we try to do in order to preserve our sanity and well-being. We tend to feel pretty crappy if all we do is eat fast food for three days. The first day or so we try to carry at least one meal a day with us. After that food is gone, we try to stop once a day at an actual sit down restaurant.  We do this so we are able to order vegetables or fruit. When we stop at places where the kids can play, we try to let them play the whole time we are stopped. They eat when we get back in the car so they get as much energy out as possible. If we have to stop someplace where there is no place for them to safely run and play, we try to go for a walk before getting back in the car. (We try not to have this happen.)

 

 

 

 

The Witching Hour

Juli

Thoughts while sitting on the floor outside my 4-year-old’s room, listening to him scream and holding the door shut with my foot.

 

I can’t believe I’m in for another hour and a half of this.

My butt hurts.

My back hurts.

Scratch that, everything hurts.  I’m 6 months pregnant, for crying out loud.  This is not the best time to be sitting in my hallway on the floor for hours.

There has got to be a better (but still fitting) punishment than “timeout until Daddy comes home.”

Maybe the real problem is Daddy doesn’t come home early enough in the day.

It’s adorable that my 2-year-old thinks he needs to hold vigil here with me, chewing graham cracker crumbs all over the place and looking sympathetic.

Bet the teenager wishes he had something to do today after school.  Is it possible he will go stark raving mad before  5 pm, with all this screaming?

This would be a whole lot easier if I put his doorknob on backwards so it locked from the outside.  I’m sure that’s illegal.

This would also be easier if I was sitting with a glass of wine instead of coffee.  Pregnancy strikes again.

I wonder how dinner is going to get made.

I need to go through the baby clothes sometime and size them carefully and discard the super old stained ones.

Forgot to take the Christmas wreath off the kids’ door.  One decoration always gets left behind. Every year.

This toy chest my dad built the kids makes a great coffee table.  Being that it’s out here in the hallway with me.  Because the little boys were using it to climb up and open windows in the dead of winter.  Naturally.

Aaaaaand now my leg is asleep.

Somedaaaaay my prince will cooooome (at 5 pm.)

Now the dog has joined the camp-out.  If only this were actually for fun.

The screaming seems to have stopped.  What a relief.

Laptop has entered dim-to-save-battery mode.  Joy.

Is that the front door opening?  IS IT?!  I can’t leave my vigil to go and see, but dear sweet bejebus, I think it’s over.

Road trips: Driving Overnight

Deb

Wisconsin to California. This is our yearly vacation plan. My in-laws live in  California and with that comes some interesting discussions in my family. We have flown, driven without stopping for the night, and taken three days with some rather small children to make this trip. This past summer was no different. Starting in January we began to make plans for our trip. My husband only gets two weeks of vacation, so getting to and from California as quickly and safely as possible is always the goal. Flying is really too expensive now with five of us, so driving is where we started planning. We realized that it would be faster to leave on a Sunday afternoon then to wait for Monday morning and so the plan was hatched to drive through the night on Sunday. We survived but we did learn some things along the way.

Stop to Sleep

Now this may not sound like the way to drive thru the night. We found as we traveled deeper into the night that it got harder and harder to stay awake, which I mean makes sense. As this happened more and more we decided to pull over for an hour or so to try to take a nap as best we could. We found a well lit parking lot and tried to get some sleep. This was the best thing we could have done. When we pulled out of the parking lot an hour and a half later, we felt rested and much more ready to tackle a few more miles on the road. If your planning a trip that has you driving through the night, give yourself a break. Allow yourself the freedom to take a catnap along the way.

Crunchy Snacks/Caffeinated Beverages

Once the sun goes down and your driving in the dark, having something for your mouth to do can help you stay awake. We had made our own trail mix and pretzel mix before we left. We enjoyed these snacks throughout the night. We also bought Monster energy drinks and had some caffeinated soda in our travel mugs from the last gas station. Plan snacks that maybe aren’t something you would get normally so it is a special treat.  It makes the trip have a little bit of fun, while having a duel purpose of helping you stay awake.

Pillows/Blankets

Not for the driver, but for the passengers. We had three young children in the back of our vehicle. we wanted them to sleep through the night as much as possible. Because of this yearly trip our kids get a child sized neck pillow on their first birthday. We also took along car sized blankets for them to cover up with. Not only do these work as comfort items and to help with keeping the kids warm. It helps to give a routine to set a sleep time. On the last stop before we wanted them actually go to sleep for awhile we actually sort of tuck them into their car seats for the night.

Be Ready for Anything

Be flexible. Realize that this may not work the way you wanted it to. During this 30 hour driving marathon we actually ended up getting a flat tire pretty much in the middle of no where. The kids ended up eating breakfast on the side of the road while my husband and I (mostly my husband) changed the tire so we could continue on our journey.

What are some ways you have made travelling with kids bearable? have you found any secrets that have made different parts of your trip more enjoyable or things you may never try again? Leave a comment below.

To work or not to work? Is that the question? -deb

Juli

So your pregnant and are looking to the future. Are you going to stay home with your newborn or are you going to go back to work? It’s a question all new parents must struggle with. In sharing my story I’m hoping to give you some insights into why my family made the decisions we did as pertaining to working with kids.

When I caught baby fever, about a year into our marriage, my husband and I talked about how we wanted to raise our family and when it would work best for us to have our first child. We originally made plans that I would be a stay at home mom and we would adjust our budget to make that possible. This seemed like a perfect plan, my husband was on schedule with his schooling to get a full-time paid internship and then would only have one year of school left. We figured we could make the sacrifices needed to make our plans a reality.

When we found out we were pregnant with our first it seemed like our plans were falling into place.  God had different plans for us though, my husband’s school track changed. With my husband’s school track changing our plans changed and we decided that me working full-time would be the best decision for our family. My husband’s schedule changed to classes twice a week instead of everyday so he was able to be home with our daughter most of the time and when he had class we had been able to find an in home daycare for her to go to. I regretted not being home with her but I told myself that she slept most of the time anyway so I wasn’t missing much. I took advantage of every minute I was home with her though.

When our daughter was a year old I was able to be a stay at home mom. I thought I would rock at this job. This was my dream come true. I had all of my time to dedicate to my daughter and would be able to give her all my attention. I knew getting out would be key to my success, so we went to story time at the library. I had all this time and she was showing signs of readiness so we started potty training. I would had all sorts of time to do anything we wanted. It didn’t take long though till I was crazy and bored.

My daughter wouldn’t take naps when I wanted her to. I was unable to do even my short to do list. My daughter wanted me to sit and watch her play for hours. I couldn’t handle it. My one year old was emotionally draining me everyday and I wasn’t finding any joy in being with her. Although staying home was something I thought I wanted to do I was really struggling with this lifestyle mentally and emotionally.

I went back to work when my daughter was 19 months old. I worked full-time and sent my daughter to daycare. I was again struck by mom guilt with leaving my child under someone else’s care, but I realized I was able to enjoy spending time with her in the evenings and on the weekends instead of dreading the whole day when I woke up and didn’t really know what the day would bring.

I thought that maybe the number of kids affected my ability to stay home, so when we had our second child I again tried to stay home. It wasn’t the crazy boredom this time but the housekeeping that drove me crazy. Maybe I have unrealistic expectations for myself and just can’t let them go. I felt that since I was home all day there really wasn’t a reason why I couldn’t keep my house immaculately clean every day or cross items off my to do list every day.

So when I was offered a position to teach part time which I jumped on it, and here I am now working part time with three kids and for the most part enjoying the craziness that a busy schedule brings.

Do I think all parents should work? No. Do I think all families should have one parent at home with their kids? No, that has to be left up to each family to decide. I want people to realize that there is more to consider in the decision making process then can we afford this option or that option. Leave yourself open to both options if at all possible. Be aware that what you always saw for yourself as a parent may not be what works best for you in the trenches of parenthood.

Are you a stay at home mom or a working mom? Do you have any pointers on how you made the decision to work or not to work? Leave a comment below.

Let Go of Mom Guilt: Capturing Memories

admin

Mom guilt takes up residence in all kinds of sneaky places.  Let’s address one of those today.

I am never here to mom-bash, so I am definitely not linking to this or mentioning usernames.  While meandering on Pinterest, I saw a pin about mom checklists, specifically “Can’t Miss Photos of the Month.”
There were something like 50 photo opportunities listed here!  If this were a list for the whole year, it might be conceivable.  Being a checklist of 50 photos you “can’t miss” of your kids each MONTH means 90% of people pinning that are going to fail, miserably.  And with that idealism + failure equation, mom guilt sets in.

Do you have a handful of pictures of each kid each year?  You’re doing fine.  (Bonus points if YOU are in any of them!)

I had a looming fear when I had a second child that I wouldn’t take “enough” pictures of him.  Whatever “enough” means.  I love taking pictures, and I had taken a plethora of my oldest because he was so stinkin’ adorable all the time.  Probably ridiculous, but one of my biggest concerns about adding a second child was that they wouldn’t feel as special because I wouldn’t focus solely on them – wouldn’t take as many pictures.  That there would be digital and print evidence that I “loved the older one more.”

After child #2 being on the planet for a full year, let me tell you.  There are just as many pictures.  In fact, I upgraded to a smart phone recently so there are actually BETTER pictures this time around.  Gasp.  There are so many sweet moments between the two boys that I take photos on an almost-daily basis.

I have my own checklist – make sure I take a photo the day a child joins our family, and on each birthday.  Sometimes I remember to take one on “firsts.”
But about “firsts.”  I have learned this – it is far more important to be engaged, present, actually watching the firsts, than it is to be taking photos or videos.  In 20 years, it might be fun for your child to page through photos of their firsts.  It might impress or entertain some relatives or a future child-in-law.  But really, those firsts are the most important to you as their parent.  And what you hold most dear will be a strong memory of having actually witnessed this event, not a sterile photo of it taking place.

While we’re on this topic, let me address scrapbooks.  If this is a hobby of yours, wonderful!  Go forth and craft.  If it’s not, let it go!  Remember our moms’ photo books of yesteryear?  There were some pictures with names or dates scrawled on maybe half of them, jammed into photo albums.  Done.  And our lives weren’t any less rich for it.

Maybe a lesser guilt: printing physical photos.  This is one I feel distinctly, as a natural cynic.  I assume that the internet is going to fail me at some point in the future, and my photos backed up in the mysterious “cloud” will disappear.  And then who will get to see all the badly-timed smartphone photos I took?!
I have decided to let go of that mom guilt by specifically printing photos once a year.  Around December, after everybody’s birthdays in November, I go on a spree one night and choose pictures to print.  I get them done “overnight” to our local-ish Walmart and pick them up the next day when I go to pick up my photo Christmas cards.  Sometimes some of them make it in an album.  Good enough.
I’m going to try photobooks this next year – supposedly I can use my Instagram and have them automatically curated and delivered to me.  Sounds wonderful!

Be present with your kids.  Put down the camera/phone.  Watch and encourage and feel.

That sense of family created by memories is what you’re really after.  Photographic evidence that it existed is just extra.

Souvenirs for Kids

admin
…that aren’t garbage.  Or toys.
When I was a kid, my dad traveled a few times a year for work.  He always brought back souvenirs for my sister and me, which was ridiculously exciting to my little hoarder self.  Postcards, t-shirts, stuffed animals, plastic travel mugs, tiny statue replicas… You name it, I had it.
I love what my dad was trying to do – generate a fun surprise for when he got home.  And it was wonderful!  
But the stuff.  
Oh my.
Going on a trip, and wanting to buy your children/grandchildren/nieces and nephews/nanny charges something? Great! Here’s some suggestions on how to do that without clogging up their room with stuff.
Washcloths or towels.  Especially those kind that come all compressed into a little brick and then revive when you wet them.  It’s super fun to make them grow, but then you have a very useful item left over.  Those washcloths are actually really soft and big!  Bonus: easy to fit in your suitcase!
These adorable washcloths are from Grandma and Grandpa’s trip to Hawaii.  I don’t know what “A Coconut Named Bob” is about, but it’s SO CUTE an SOFT.  Big L enjoyed wetting them and watching them “grow.”
A pen/pencil or eraser (for school aged children.). They can can use it at school and tell their friends about their cool relative who went cool places.  And it is consumable.  Rulers and folders are also good possibilities!
Candy/regional snacks.  Does your location have a particular packable food item that kids would like?  Saltwater taffy from the coast? Fudge from Michigan?  Maple sugar candies from Vermont or Canada?
1 T-shirt, 1 size too big.
Because they are already wearing their current size, so obviously mom and dad have dealt with their current wardrobe and they have enough clothes.  The shirt will get more wear if it is an intentional part of their next wardrobe.
A book.  Now, I am a softy for books – it is the one area of my home I have yet to purge.  That being said, a book about the cool place you went (at an appropriate reading level, of course) might be a perfect souvenir.
A useful item they can grow into.  For example, if your special child is almost ready for a water bottle, or a plate, or a baseball cap, or their own cocoa mug.  That way is not an extra of that item, but  it is the one the child uses daily because his/her parents know they already have one.
Any other great ideas for souvenirs for minimalist kids?  Leave them in a comment!  Happy travels.